SOCIAL MEDIA

It's Not About the Toaster

3.10.2018
I cried over our toaster the other day. My Eggo was stuck and I had to tip it on it's side and use a fork to get it out. It didn't come out in one piece though so I got frustrated. Before I knew it I was crying saying, "I just want a toaster that works!" Tyler held me and the flood of tears came rolling. He knew as well as I did that it wasn't about the toaster. 


The toaster, the car, the shower... all things I had complained about that week. They all seemed to be a nagging representation of what we didn't have. (I realize that sounds odd because as I write this I am becoming aware that just HAVING those things puts us in a very blessed part of the world's population.) I've been so caught up in the frustration of things not working the way they "should". For heaven sakes we've been married for 6 years! We "should" have a toaster that works at this point.

Oddly enough we've had a lot of dear friends announce their pregnancy + births over the last few weeks. (We're hoping something's in the water!} We are very excited for them, honest! I understand that with each blessing others receive, it doesn't take any away from me but why do I still feel like I lost something? I spent a long time today trying to figure out what exactly I was "losing" and the only word I could come up with was hope. Though, I don't really know how that makes sense. It just feels like everyone else has a toaster, a car and a shower that works.... so why don't we?

I want to trust that everything is as it "should" be but I think it's human nature to want to improve. I think it's important that we always strive to better our situations and circumstances. Something about looking at it as wanting to improve felt less like complaining however, if I plan to use that mindset, I need to reflect on the improvements that have already happened over the last few years because THAT is when my heart feels grateful.

I share this today with the hope that I can remember how far we've come. I want it to be a reminder that our lives are still incredibly blessed. I never want to forget that tender scene of a loving husband comforting his sobbing wife in a purple bathrobe who's pretending she's only crying over a toaster. I never want to forget the words we didn't need to say as our hearts both ached realizing- it was never about the toaster. 

Post a Comment