This Summer I wrote myself a postcard from my trip to Guatemala (read more about it here). It was a letter to myself- thoughts I wanted to remember 6 months from my return. 

A dear sweet friend held on to this postcard for months and then sent it back to me. This precious postcard (which apparently survived the scars of USPS) could not have come on a better day. 

I've been feeling stretched lately. In efforts to discover who I am "outside of infertility", all my imperfections have come to light. I am trying to learn forgiveness and patience, kindness and peace. I am trying to understand God's plan for me and walk His path. I am trying to be more kind to myself. I am learning to love myself. 

My Decision To Move Forward

Last November (2015) we decided we would go ahead and proceed with our first IUI (learn more about IUI's here). We were naive and assumed that making such a big step was bound to grant us guarantee pregnancy. I still remember that December day we got the call. Even thinking about it now puts my stomach in knots. We were a nervous wreck all day long. I had the clinic leave us a voicemail because good or bad... I did not want to take that call at work. I wanted to listen to it with my husband. Unfortunately we got the news that the IUI didn't take. I cried and Tyler held me. Then I got dressed and went to a church activity I was helping with.